Sunday, April 25, 2010

Gemini Bunny Loses Her Twin

Today, my best friend left the house to go back home in Terrace Bay. I always saw my friend as my gemini twin because we are so alike, though not as much since I got into a relationship.

Her and I were very free-willed people, taking life easy and enjoy it as much as we can. Loving life as it is. Enjoy being ourselves. Smiling every chance we get. We both had similar ideals about life in general. We also like to stay away from drama as much as possible.

I have enjoyed my time this year living with her. During the summer we used to sit outside the house, get some sun and looking at people passing by. We also walked to the fountain on campus, talk, and look at people passing by. We shared lots of gossips together. Sometimes we go into each other's room just to talk. I went to her room because I find myself being bored or needing to get some social life. I go to her because I feel like I can talk to her about anything and we always have something to talk about. we have a good trust on each other because I would tell her things I would not tell anyone, or she will tell me things she won't tell anyone. She always came to me and hug me - and sometimes she jokingly try to snap my bra or have unappropriate lesbian jokes- We planned couple events together, like Hoops Night.

When she left today, I felt like a piece of me is leaving me. Who am i going to sit outside with? Who am I going to complain about people to? Whose singing will I hear? Who am I going to tell gossips to? Who am i going to do the volcaaaanooooo high five? Who do I giggle with? Who is going to high five me about evil things? There are certainly people I can do this with, and still some other friends who are still here, but it's not going to be the same.

With the surprise party another friend threw her and how she was crying when she left, I suddenly realized how much her friendship means to her, and how valuable friendships are. When she cried she made us all cry. Some people are amazing friends. Sometimes I wish I had more friends like them. It makes me wonder if I have friends like that, who would throw me a surprise good-bye party and be sad when I leave. But this is usually not the case because I am always the one that stays the last. It is like when I was in residence and I had to see everyone leave and I had to stay until the very last date.

Times like this makes me think that I need to take friendship more seriously, not that I don't, but I need to build stronger bonds with people and make really good friends. Because I really don't wanna end up like my mother who barely has any friends and spends the entire time in the house with my dad. I really wants friends I can rely on. Good friends I feel comfortable talking about things. Like I saw on television on a show called Boss in disguise or something, "build relationships, then do business". I need to build relationships with people. Because it is just going to benefit me, in every single way.

It is indeed really sad to see people move away. Today two of my friends moved out of the house, the two I get along the best with. But even more than that, a whole bunch of people I know are moving on with their lives. Lots of them are graduating and going on separate ways in life. My best friend is going home and pursuit her career in theatre. Couple friends are moving to downtown to live. Some are going back home after graduation. Others are going to college or graduate school. It is like high school again, when all your friends are leaving to do different things and going to different schools. No wonder it is so hard to keep a friendship. Once bonds are made, it's meant to be broken. Because honestly, when people move, they change. People might stayn in touch with you for the first couple months, but it is just going to die away slowly and then you don't get in touch with them. Been there, done that. That is probably why I don't take friendships so seriously. Because I don't wanna get hurt when they leave me. But I guess that's part of life.

Losing friendships means you gain new ones, but not forgetting old ones. The best thing to do is do my best to create great bonds with people, at least temporary, but they are going to be strong bonds.

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